Why You Don't Score A Second Date

Why You Don’t Score A Second Date

While checking out my inbox this morning, I came across a very interesting message from Lawrence, a long-time AdviceForHim.com reader. He shares that he’s rather unlucky in the dating scene and can’t seem to score a second date no matter how hard he tried.

Lawrence adds that besides making sure he looks and smells nice during a first date, he also does everything he can to make the woman he’s out with feel that all his attention is on her. He does this by listening to her intently when she’s talking and doing acts of courtliness like pulling his date’s chair as well as opening doors for her.

However, Lawrence also reveals that he has the habit of buying a woman an expensive gift or two for their first date just to give her the notion that he’s a sweet guy. Well, I think I already know what the problem is and you should follow along to prevent turning off a woman even before your date really began…

During my extensive research into the female psychology, I discovered that women have a soft spot for even the simplest gestures of affection. This can be anything from a handwritten thank you note, a teddy bear, her favorite candy bar or perhaps a bouquet of flowers.

As it turns out, a woman’s brain releases a rush of feel-good hormones like oxytocin and serotonin whenever it detects that she is the recipient of a gesture of affection. Besides putting her in a more relaxed mood, these hormones also make her feel happier and excited at the same time.

However, there is one key factor that you should know before showering the woman you’ve finally convinced to go out with you on a date with a lot of gifts…

The effect is going to be the exact opposite if a woman doesn’t know the person enough or isn’t even emotionally close to the person who is giving her a lot of gifts. Instead of letting loose feel-good hormones, the brain releases their stress-inducing counterparts because it sees this as a red flag.

A woman will have the notion that you’re simply giving her presents because you want something from her. She will only end up feeling more anxious and rather difficult to build an emotional connection with. Plus, it also makes you look desperate and trying too hard, which takes away any brownie points that you may have earned along the way.

In short, you’re going to have a hard time making her like you and convincing her to go out on a second date.

So if you’re really looking to get a woman to say yes to a second date, keep in mind not to overdo it on the gift-giving. Simply making her feel as special as you can, showing her that you’ve got the right confidence levels and taking care of the bill of your first one is enough to pull it off.


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